Sunday, December 18, 2011

Gifting tips for the Rational types – A note to my husband

Right, so Christmas and New Years Eve are around the corner. And I have feeling that even this year, I will have to ask my husband for a gift. No, it is not a reminder, dropping an occasional hint or subtle cues - he expects an explicit description of what is on my mind. He can manage with some basic info - product, brand, size, color, type etc - but he would be really pleased if you include the bar-code details.

Put it simply, he isn’t very good when it comes to gifts, especially surprise gifts. He thinks the tradition of gifting was invented by the trader-class as a ploy to increase their business and profits. He says "There are multiple problems with the concept of gifts. Forced reciprocity, false expectations and inefficient exchange are the main issues with the tradition"  

Pleased at the prospect of having found a bemused listener, he goes on to explain "When you give a gift, you are putting the receiver in debt and forcing the other person to spend a similar amount of money. More often than not, people either buy gifts that they would like to have themselves or they buy things that are cheap and unimaginative when the gift is anonymous”.  

I wanted to say I can see the point now but instead said "You are unbelievable! God, how do you argue with such people?”

I kept thinking about my anniversary gift, an iPad 2 - it was first of its kind gift from my husband and I was pleased about it, until now. Reflecting on his latest thoughts, I wonder if it was really a gift, especially since he uses it more than I do! Just kidding, I am being really nasty now...

Back to the plot, I think emotional creatures like us who love gifts, a little surprise and a bit of irrationality in our life has the duty to teach the dry rationalist types a thing or two. So with just less the 7 days to the Christmas Eve, I would like to give you 5 clues (sorry, it does not get any clearer than this!) to help you solve the mystery to buying gifts.

1. Never believe when someone says “I don’t want a gift; I have everything that I want”
2. Do not fall for “you can get me anything” bait. (This line is usually a test - think hard)
3. Don't get carried away. It does not have to be expensive!
4. Wrapping paper and a thoughtful note goes a long way in making it personal
5. Keep the receipt - just in case.....


  1. Story of my life. Infact my husband thinks it is ok to just take me to the mall and let me buy my own gift. Aaargh MEN!!!!

  2. Clearly we are addressing a universal issue!

  3. nothing like personalized gifts..been a long time that I made eon

  4. I like your thoughts here... but in many I agree with your husbands summery of gift giving. Specially these days, it really is a trader-class ploy.

    I have enjoyed reading, thank you.


  5. Totally agree with ur husband...I feel he is rite.
    Inbetween nice and real one...

  6. Swagat - yes personalised gifts are the best .. :D

    Sharonlee and Burhan - Thank you for stopping by. I am glad you've enjoyed reading this post. Yes Yes as much I would hate to admit it my husband is Right!

  7. I liked that 5 commandments :)

  8. Baapre, such an analytical answer for a gift!! Sangy i m sure he is a financial analyst or something related to research and analaysis ;)

  9. Deepak - that is the ultimate truth .. :D

  10. Last birthday my husband was away from me, but he called up at 12 midnight and told me to go to a particular bag and remove the duppatta and I found a Nikon D90, which was exactly what I wanted. So there are also men who listen and find out what exactly needs to be gifted, but then when it comes from men it is an art :)

  11. amusing post. but i tell you, rationality is incurable. it's like banging your head against an immovable wall. *sigh*

  12. Subhadra - ah ha you've got the perfect one!! That is the reality all we need is men who can understand us.

    Phenomenal Woman - you are right its incurable .. think I will have to live with it, atleast one of us is rational ..

  13. Gosh...I know what you are talking about, my husbands the same type...just a few notches lower though(I hope he dsnt read this), he tells me you can go and buy whatever you want,*conditions apply*, then why do I need to get you a gift?

    But at the same time if I fail to get him a gift on any of HIS special days,(that he conveniently forgets are my special days too), he is not happy.

    He loves receiving gifts but never believes in taking the efforts to get one.

  14. Pooja - I think we should work on a manual, considering they all are almost the same kinds ..

  15. yeah we can show our love & care towards our dear ones by gifting,,

    who is not delighted by a gift !!

    good post sangeeta (the e magazine)

  16. Readitt, Kalpana and Rajendra - thank you very much .. Wish you all a very happy and prosperous new year ...

  17. That was such a nice post!! :) I'll need to keep this in mind to gift my future hubby someday!! :)

    Your new follower :)

    1. Glad you liked it .. It surely did work for me this time !!

  18. As i was peeking into ur blog..this post exactly looks like my same story..
    my hubby too gives a long story and once in a while he gets me gift..
    As u said these men use most of the time what they got for us..
    poor me not able to use my ipad as he hangs out most of the time :(
    keep sharing

  19. Took me time to read all the comments, but I really love the article. It proved to be very helpful to me and I am sure to all the commenters here! It’s always nice when you can not only be informed, but also engaged! I’m sure you had joy writing this article.personalised gifts


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